One big push

Push ... giggle
push, push... giggle
push, push, push, SHOVE
... giggle, giggle shriek ... giggle.

I could go on for a while before I paint the verbal picture. I guess you all know how fun it is to push your little ones on a swing. Eliot just learned how to pump this summer so now Eliannah is the only recipient of my fabulous underdogs.

In other news Zak is now reading small words and short sentences. He is so excited and so am I. I love witnessing his excitement and helping him along. He has wanted to read for some time now but he just needed a little push in the right direction.

Isn't it interesting that most of us begin our life outside the womb with a push and that is exactly what we need sometimes to get over some of life's daunting hurdles or past life's hurts. My words have totally come back to bite me (see my blog on excuses below) when I start to look around at why I haven't made more of a difference in the lives of those around me. Why haven't I reached out to my neighbors? Why haven't I said "hi" to the family in apartment #8 when I know they have a little girl that is the same age as Eliannah?

Yesterday Zak really wanted to bring flowers to Mary and I kept putting it off. Mary is a little old lady that lives about a block away. She spends her entire day in her garage in either her wheelchair or her easy chair. She eats her meals at a picnic table set up there and watches the world go by. I think her son lives with her and takes care of her but I haven't seen him much.

I've always been proud of myself for teaching the kids to wave at her and say hi as we pass by. We have talked to her a couple of times but it is always difficult because she is very deaf and can't really understand us. I don't know why I am so afraid of such a lonely old lady but when we set out for her house with a bunch of flowers in our hands my heart was thumping. I hate to invade people's space so I was relieved that she wasn't there. Zak almost cried but I told him to go up and put the flowers on her chair. By the time the kids had tiptoed up to her garage she must have heard us and slowly wheeled herself out. I totally felt like a trespasser but she just loved the flowers (dandelion bouquets were never prettier than when they are delivered by a child). We stood around awkwardly for a few moments , told her that we were praying for her and left.

I still don't know why it was so hard! I wouldn't have done it at all if Zak hadn't hounded me all day about it. I guess all I needed was that little push ...

Mrs Invisible

A few weeks ago a friend of mine blogged about how she was feeling invisible. I can totally relate. Another friend of mine emailed me an article that gave me some good perspective. Since I can't say it better, here it is.

As seen on TV

Here it is ...
the new, improved
comprehensive
quick reference
pocket sized
book of unacceptable excuses! Here's a quick peak at some good ones

I'm too old: Noah was 600 years old when he finished the ark
I'm too young: How old was David when he killed Goliath? see what Paul had to say to Timothy about his age
I'm afraid of speaking in front of other people, I don't know what to say: Check out the Lord's response to Moses
I'm too weak, I'm not smart enough : take a look at I Corinthians
I don't want to/ I shouldn't have too: Jonah thought he could run from God and that didn't turn out so whale. (sorry, couldn't help myself)
I don't have the time, I can't, etc: to Whom do we belong?

And for those of you that think to yourself "Living for Christ is too difficult and costs too much" Just remember that "While we were sinners, Christ died for us". We can love because He first loved us. So Christian, you have no excuse for avoiding the good works that Christ prepared for you.

Forgive me for being so harsh, I'm preaching to the mirror on this one but I have to ask what are your excuses? What are you avoiding? Am I the only person that tries to avoid doing the good I know I ought to do?

Last night I had to stop what I was doing, put down my bible and make a phone call to an unbelieving friend (she wasn't home, I left a message). While I was in the kitchen I just happened to think about another friend that I had been praying for and gave her a call too. Her attitude was such a blessing to me I'm glad I let go of my excuses last night and just followed the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Salad Supper

It's tonight!! Do you have a babysitter or willing spouse? Come and fellowship with your sisters in Christ, bring a salad and a family picture to discuss at your table. If you have never gone before and hate salad eat on the way there and save your appetite for dessert. There are only 4 of these a year so don't miss out!

Adendum

More about the car ... I noticed on Saturday that the way those nasty thieves got in was by punching in the lock. They were nice nice enough to chuck my purse on the side of the road when they had finished going through it so I got it back and if I can just get the scuff marks off of it I'll be happy.

Oh crumb...

Last night Phillip was out of town and at 3 in the morning my car was broken into. All they took was my purse (with debit cards, credit cards, gift cards etc.) and I don't know how they got in since it was locked. I was alerted to their presence by my car alarm going off but had the presence of mind to not walk out to the apartment parking lot and check on things until the police got there. I'm no hero.

The reason I am sharing my sad story is to pass along a tip. Ladies, don't leave your purses in your car! There were much nicer cars than mine to rip off but the thieves were going for whatever was in plain sight and easy to access. Happily no glass was broken and besides a little bit of mess to clean up (they dumped out my glove compartment) I was glad that I had recently removed my social security cards, checkbook and ipod from my purse and glove compartment and also glad that they got no more than $.72 in change.

The biggest reason I'm so bummed is I really liked that purse, it's a pain to replace all my cards, I lost about $50 in gift cards and I can't remember the brand name of my favorite lipstick!

I was struck today by how lucky I am to be complaining about something so small. I can imagine that people in the Middle East have much more to fear on a daily basis and lose life and limb while going about their business. I was also reminded of an article I read recently about how corrupt the police force is in Mexico and how different it is here. I am thankful for the two trustworthy police officers that showed up, and I have full confidence that they will both protect and serve the public interest as they go about their job. What a great country we live in!

my turn

o.k. I guess it's my turn to share my favorite things. My dial up sucks so I'll just share a couple of pictures. This one is my piano. It needs refinishing and so I thought I'd be crafty and paint an ugly little flower deal on it. Didn't turn out so great. I'm considering my next move.


I also love my great-grandmothers 100 year old cookbook. It has the most amazing recipes (I had to figure out what a "slow oven" was) and the most amazing remedies as well. For instance to ventilate a room place a pitcher of cold water in it and it will absorbe all the harmful gasses in the room caused by respiration. There are recipes for removing freckles, curing pimples, increasing hair in the eyebrows alongside chapters on how to serve state dinners and antidotes to poison. I wish I could list it all. It is so cool.

And speaking of old things I love vintage shoes, clothes, knick knacks, - you name it. Here is a picture of some of my favorite shoes that I don't wear (they look lame in the picture but with the right outfit may be I could pull it off!)



not pictured are my sandals with the intricately hand carved wedge heel, calf length black leather boots, red cowboy boots and many, many others. I also have a lot of vintage clothes (my grandmother's swing dancing skirt and top) but don't wear them very often.

I could go on all day about my Dyson vacuum, apple laptop and other favorite "modern contrivances" but the kids just woke up from a nap.

FINALLY!!!!!!

Eliannah has been potty trained for the last 2 months but has decided to save her "big business" for her panties. Yuck! Pull-ups are so hard for her to pull up and pull down that I hate to make her wear them so I've just been dealing with the extra laundry. But today after a couple days of a technic better not mentioned on a blog she voluntarily went in her own little toilet! (you know you are a mom when you get excited about where your kid um ... unloads.) Hooray!!

What about you?

You know you are a mom (or a parent) when ...

Camp Moses

The short story is: We had a wonderful time at the church camp out and it was well worth all the immense time and effort it took to pack and will take to unpack. Phillip didn't arrive until 11:00 on Friday so I had to set up camp by myself. I had fun wrestling with a few tent poles but the way they make tents these days make it pretty easy to assemble. I am usually horrible about starting and maintaining a fire so I cheated and bought a little fire starter log. This meant that Phillip was able to come to a neat little campsite with a nice little fire and some decaf coffee to drink while we enjoyed a few moments of gazing at the stars before we rolled in to bed exhausted. (Note to self: queen sz mattress is by no means the same sz as a queen size bed). The kids slept just fine and we managed to catch a little sleep as well.

Saturday was just one long day of fun at the beach. Everyone from church set up a little tent city so there was shade to sit under. It was super hot outside but with a nice warm lake to jump in to it wasn't bad. While Phillip attempted to lull Eliot and Eliannah to sleep in the car (didn't work though), Zak and I went boating and I got to ski.

Sunday we spent some time just chatting with our campsite neighbors, half heartedly packing up and wholeheartedly going to church. Phillip and I were exhausted at this point but I perked up when he said I could stay and go skiing while he took the little ones home. I didn't think I had the energy to pack up so fast!

After Phillip and the kids left I headed down to the beach and got to go skiing twice. It was glorious!! I forgot how much I missed it. By the end of the day the lake was pretty choppy so I couldn't really do much in the way of "practicing" but it was nice to just have my ski on and be slaloming back and forth across a nice warm lake. Thank you everyone who took me on your boat!! I appreciate it so much!!

Well ... maybe

I guess I need to rethink my list (see below) since many of you think wet t.p. might be kind of nice every once in a while and prepaid cremation is a good investement.

Here are the newest things not found in my shopping cart:
1. hemp tampons
2. vintage underwear
3. fake hair: like a toupee, no one is fooled.

Now I have to admit I bought some once and spent 2 hours trying to make it work, it never did and my kids now play with it like it is some strange pet.

( Jeannette and Brianna, I'll be sending you a brochure on a"Simple, Economical, Dignified" cremation certificate that could win you a free "environmentally friendly" cremation.)

Things I will never purchase

1. pre-moistened toilet paper
2. pre-cooked bacon ... that you warm up in the microwave
3. do-it-yourself microdermabrasion a.k.a facial sandblaster
4. cellulite cream (i hav enuf thnx!)
5. prepaid cremation

Where did I come up with that last one? I got some junk mail urging me to buy now or enter my name in their monthly drawing. They were even thoughtful enough to suggest that if I had already taken care of my burial expenses I could pass along the savings to a friend. Only one lucky winner per month but they didn't limit the amount of times you could win. I wonder if I could get my whole family taken care of?

This is almost as bad as Costco selling coffins (not in SLO or Smra). If you ever have to buy a sixpack of coffins my heart goes out to you.

Don't get me wrong, I am a coupon shopper, I do my best to save every penny I can but I don't think I would ever go with the cheapest:

1.) lasic eye surgery
2.) safety harness
3.) professional daycare
4.) bike helmet
5.) survival guide

Another big one ...

So Jeannette got me thinking about irrational fears and here is my very biggest fear ..
I'm afraid of heaven! it doesn't seem right I know but I fear eternity as I look around a world that is designed to decompose, decay and cease to exist (not that is a pleasant alternative!) My mind cannot fathom a heaven that has been under construction for the last 2 millennium while earth and our universe took only 6 days.

I'm also deathly afraid of God. I'm afraid to approach His throne and give an account of every minute. He knows the good works he prepared for me to walk in and he knows the times I've "known the good I ought to do and didn't do it". It gives me comfort to know that Jesus understands our weakness but I can just hear John Piper telling me "Don't Waste your Life" I sometimes feel that at the age of 28 I should have more to show for the 10510 days I've spent on earth (not including leap year).

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be great, I don't necessarily want to leave a lasting mark on the pages of history, I don't even have to be all that special or important. I just want to be able to look at my life and know that I tried to use and hone my talents for God's glory, express my gifts in the church and share the gospel at every opportunity.

Not only do I feel like I haven't done any of that, I feel like I am just barely taking care of the basics. Why it takes a whole exhausting day to clean the house (when I left it clean before going to sleep!), cook 3 nutritious meals for my kids, take care of some of their most pressing emotional, physical and spiritual needs, and take care of my husband's expressed needs before going to bed and starting over, is beyond me.

Sunday's sermon on (one of my favorites!) Psalm 39 got me thinking

vs4-5,7 Oh Lord, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days, let me know how fleeting I am! Behold you have made my days a few hands breadths and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath! Surely man goes about as a shadow.

I feel like I have always had David's perspective in these few verses without his perspective in verse 7

And now, Oh Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you.

I lack that "Christian carrot" that all believers are supposed to look forward to. Some verses that come to mind are (not even a fraction of the list in my concordance)

Phil 3:20 "but our citizenship is in heaven"
Col 1:5 Paul "thank(s) God ... because of the hope laid up for you in heaven"
I Peter 1:3-9 our hope is in salvation, our inheritance is in heaven and .. "in this you rejoice"

So why do I continue in my Christian walk if I avoid the "prize" and the terrible and awesome delight of being with God at the end of my life? Because deep down I long for God, I long to please Him, know Him, love Him and because of my love, serve Him. Sometimes I get so caught up in my failure that I stifle the Holy Spirit's leading and prefer to remain distant and autonomous rather than go through the joyful and painful process of being conformed to his likeness.

Praise God that (Phil 1:6)
"He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."

"Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory majesty, dominion, and authority before all time and now and forever. Amen"
Jude 24