True Confessions

So... many of you may have suspected this for a while now and it's time to come clean. I'm ready to admit I have a drinking problem. I'm not sure when things got so out of control, I think it started after I had Zak and I needed a little something to help me through the day. Now that there are 3 of them it seems like I've been starting earlier and earlier and have to drink more just to stay sane. I am just like the drunkard in Proverbs who says "When will I wake up so I can find another drink?"

I actually got mad at Phillip for throwing out last night's leftovers, "I can still drink that!" I said.

You may judge me, you may not understand but there you go ...


And if you haven't figured out by now that I am talking about COFFEE I hope you haven't been too horrified by my confession. I decided long ago that I would rather be addicted to caffeine and be able to sleep less than 6 hrs a night than get enough sleep and not get anything done. I'm trying to cut back ... really, I can quit at any time... 3 cups a day is my new maximum ... and I'm about to grab my second cup at 9:19am. Am I the only one? What are you addicted to?

"Come out with me" by A.A. Milne

There's sun on the river and sun on the hill . . .
You can hear the sea if you stand quite still!
There's eight new puppies at Roundabout Farm-
And I saw an old sailor with only one arm!

But everyone says, "Run along!"
(Run along, run along!)
All of them say, "Run along! I'm busy as can be."
Every one says, "Run along,
There's a little darling!"
If I'm a little darling, why don't they run with me?

There's wind on the river and wind on the hill . . .
There's a dark dead water-wheel under the mill!
I saw a fly which had just been drowned-
And I know where a rabbit goes into the ground!

But everyone says, "Run along!"
(Run along, run along!)
All of them say, "Yes, dear," and never notice me.
Every one says, "Run along,
There's a little darling!"
If I'm a little darling, why won't they come and see?

-from Now We Are Six by A.A. Milne

I love this poem! Especially after I blogged about how I need to attend to the needs of my children a little bit more. It is so true, they are only young once, they won't remember if the house was clean and if they had quesadillas and carrot sticks for dinner 3 nights a week. They won't remember much of anything but hopefully they will have a few fun memories and a strong sense that they were loved, cherished and nurtured as a child.

First Day of K-school

Zak just loved his first day of school which was a secret relief to me. Before school even officially started he was best friends with a boy that ended up living two blocks from us! They both wore brown shirts and had the same spiderman lunchbox.

The first day of homeschool went o.k. I guess I'm going to have to reorganize my priorities and put myself further down the list. I am used to having the mornings be my time to clean, do laundry (watch Rachael Ray on T.V. - ocassionally) while the kids have "room time". They are pretty good about getting along with each other in the mornings so I've gotten a lot done. As it turns out, Zak's best learning time is in the morning, not during Eliot and Eliannah's nap time (DARN!). Oh well, I'll figure something out. ..

I'm always amazed at how self-centered I am and how much I expect to be treated like some sort of princess. Like I deserve an easy life and the kids should just raise themselves without much help.

I think I pushed the wrong button when I ordered them online, I meant to get the polite, calm quiet self-policing model but ended up with 2 rowdy boys and a tomboy that can hold her own. I wonder if the factory will take a return without a reciept? We just finished paying off Eliannah this spring so I think I can find a proof of purchase. Wow, I must be more tired than I think .... I'm just rambling away and all anyone wants is to hear about Zak, see some pictures and move on.

From Eliot to Zak

the moon is our Flashlight
the stars are too
the bathtub's our ocean
the pet store's our zoo

The sunshine all crinkled
at the base of the tree
is the light for our Boat
sailing through a Grass Sea

the piles of Sand
are a lot like snow
but sand angels are too itchy
don't ask me how I know

The best place for lunch
is underneath the table
The best place for forts
-- any place they're stable

The pet store, library
dinning room, store
They won't be as fun without you anymore!

Kidergarten

Zak is about to start Kindergarten on Monday. I almost walked out the the parent meeting last night I was so overwhelmed. I'm not ready!! I'm not ready for a kindergartner, I'm not ready to be a homeschooling mom, I'm not ready for this stage of life!! I just couldn't stop looking at Zak's hands today, they are getting so big I had to write about it

Little boy blue

Baby sneezes,
midnight snacks
3 steps forward
and you never looked back

First word, second word can't stop talking
endless running replaced your walking


Those trips to the park
catching my little "slide rocket"
going home with daisies
overflowing each pocket

I sang you to sleep
when you were little
held your hand as you grew
I taught you to speak
taught you dress
taught you to tie your shoe

You stand before me a little man
looking as big as a kindergartner can
so brave, so afraid, so excited and yet

You reach for my hand as we take the next step




(and you know you aren't ready to be a teacher when you can't spell kindergartner)

Is this normal?

So the other night I had a dream I was seriously injured by an attack goat sent to assasinate me. As I lay dying the vampire paramedic finished me off. I've never died in a dream before but nothing happened, I just landed in a different dream. The church nursery was full of sleeping babies (that's how I know it was a dream) and two grungy old men were keeping watch over them while in another corner there were rows of terrariums full if tiny dinosaurs brutally killing one another .... I think I ate too much right before bed. Mmmm .... sushi ..... what do you guys dream about?

sumtymz u hav 2 laff

Phillip came across a dumb website and kept sending me links. I couldn't figure out what was so funny until we looked at the pictures together and he read the captions aloud. I was ROFL! It is a total waste of time but sometimes a little humor goes a long way! I added the link to my sidebar or you can click here

"Pre" kidergarten

While my mother-in-law Cynthia is here she is teaching Zak "phonemic awareness". Apparently I have been doing things backwards by teaching what letters say instead of starting with teaching him to understand the way things sound. There are so many letters that kids get confused with when reading I guess this helps with phonics later on. (When you think about it all of the vowels make the sound "uh" in some words and a lot of the consonants have a "conditional identity" as well.)

It has been intensive but I think kindergarten will be much easier because of it. I have the world's greatest mother-in-law in the world! This is her vacation from running her own business as a teacher with NILD and taking care of a mother in her final stages of Parkinson's. She is such an example of hard work, dedication, responsibility, godliness and more. She has worn me and my kids out while she has been here. I don't know where she gets the energy!

If you think about it you could pray for our Grandmother Deen (Cynthia's mother). She is losing her mind and wouldn't even be with us if it weren't for the feeding tube. The family is hoping that they won't have to make a decision about whether to keep it in or not (she has an advanced directive that says she doesn't want any life support) but no one in the family is willing to take it out while she still has moments of lucidity. Thankfully she is a believer but ... how does one even pray? The only way she will ever get better is once she meets The Great Physician.

Sorry for the downer end to a random blog. Your prayers are greatly appriciated.

Avila!!

Poor skinny kid! Eliot usually has his left hand permanently glued to his waistband to hold his pants up.

Zak on the other hand, was glued to the boogie board! His grandma had to teach him what to do, I've never "boogied".
Of course no trip to Avila Beach would be complete without some park time. Eliannah is wearing a purse that Zak gave her right before we left. It's empty but "train up a child in the way he (she) should go..." right?

Salad Supper

I've been meaning to do this one for awhile now, I am trying to set up a team of people to help with the Salad Suppers. We have some great decorators and technical people what I need are people that are interested in doing

1.) music
-- helping with song selection
-- singing
-- playing an instrument (piano or something else)
-- maybe working on "special music"

2.) drama
-- skit selection
-- acting
-- directing
-- filming (in case the skit wouldn't present well in the gym)
-- whatever else is involved in minor productions

3.) speaking
-- being a speaker/ presenter
-- finding a speaker / presenter

4.) extras (craft, service project, other "bonus" stuff)

There are usually 4 Salad Suppers a year so don't worry about a huge time commitment. Depending on what you would like to help with it may only require a few hours of your time. If you are even curious and want to discuss this further feel free to contact me via email (click on the link on the sidebar) or telephone (in the church directory). If you know someone that might be willing to help you can email them this post by clicking on the envelope at the bottom of the post.

I especially need help with September's Salad Supper. The theme is "Loving your family". Once I know who may be interested (thank you to those who have already indicated you may be willing to help) we can get together and get started!

Things I've learned in the last 5 1/2 years of parenting

1.) you don't always have to say "no".
I've read "Shepherding your child's heart" and totally agree with the Tripps that you need to instill the idea of authority to your children, however, in order to prevent everything from being a confrontation where I force my will upon my children there are several ways I encourage them to do the right thing without a fight
a.) distraction: instead of saying no, point their interest somewhere else

b.) compromise: instead of forcing a child to finish their food at every meal within a specific time frame, allow them to be excused when they are full and offer the same food for "snack" or for the next meal, or decide what is a reasonable portion and ask them to eat a specific number of bites. Sometimes I put too much on their plates and I think it would be mean to make them eat it all.

2.) Know their (and your) limits: This one is hard for me sometimes I have been know to expect my kids to do things they don't know how to do or are too tired to do. Sometimes I need to go to the store and just don't have the patience to take 3 energetic children so I get angry at them for being kids (i.e. curious, lively etc.) I could say soooo much more about this one, but you get the idea.

3.) See the bigger picture: I am horrible at this. It seems like I set a goal and in order to reach it I ignore the needs of those around me instead of ditching the goal. A good example of this is when I want to have the house clean, get caught up on laundry, make a healthy dinner and greet my husband at the door freshly showered and smelling like a rose. The only way to do this is to expect my kids to entertain themselves all day, never fight and not get stir crazy from being cooped up in our small back patio. A better way of achieving that goal is to do a bit at a time and make sure I give the kids the attention they need throughout the day.


There are so many other thoughts I have but Eliot wants to play candy land and I'd love to get some tips from some of you!

Montana del Oro

We went to the tide pools yesterday. What a blast! I guess we wore everyone out because Eliot woke up twice last night throwing up again. I have disinfected and cleaned and cleaned and we can't seem to keep healthy. Poor me. In the past two months I've gone to church twice which isn't that bad I guess, it just wears on you after awhile.

Grandma's here!

For at least a week! Anybody have any ideas for fun things to do? I heard there are caves at Montana del Oro but don't know where. I've also heard there are waterfalls at Lopez and Nojoqui but don't know where. Any suggestions would be helpful, cheap is good .... free is better.

Tuesday: a perfect day

Tuesday was such a great day for me at least, Phillip woke up with some tummy trouble (could have something to do with all the cheese we ate at the buffet) so he had a miserable time of it and had to be at the conference all day while I had loads of reading to catch up on.

Now it's been a few years since I was in college and could spend a whole day sitting still and reading so I spent the day in the Gaslight district reading for awhile and then walking around until I found a new place to sit and read some more.

The best place I found was in a little pocket park that had a cobblestone courtyard, huge Ficus trees and a little old man playing sax. I looked everywhere for a little hat to throw some change in but it looked as if that was were he went to practice for the fun of it.
Later, after roaming around again I passed the only begging homeless person I had seen (even though there were tons of homeless, no one else asked me for anything.) I walked on past and pretended not to hear him but when I couldn't finish my lunch and later past him again I handed him my leftovers. I felt kind of guilty for not buying him his own meal and was ashamed of myself for hurrying away when he asked me so he could get a place to stay.

Around 7 I met Phillip and we went for Indian food before we saw the Bourne Supremacy (my favorite one by far)
and went back to the hotel to enjoy some coffee on the little balcony.

The USS Midway

So I went with the red one after all. I'll blog more about how fun the boat was but I thought I'd try to get a few pictures up although for some reason I can't get any more to upload. More later ..

Top picture is of me and Phillip in the hotel lobby. He had to wear a t-shirt from work so I didn't get to make a fuss over what he wore :(.
When we got to the ship Phillip had to check invitations for an hour before we went in together. I sat at a table and verified the guest list. By the time we got on board I was sooo excited. Because the Midway is a museum there were tons of aircraft and helicopter to look at on the upper deck. I had so much fun looking at them and being impressed by the enormity of the ship I didn't realize that the reason everyone was on the upper deck was to see the fireworks. They shot them off the very front of the boat and Phillip and I stood as close to the barrier as we could (about 500 ft away) so we felt like we were surrounded and at any minute one of the sparks was going to reach down and singe us. It was so cool!

After that we went below and mingled for a while. Since it was a cocktail party with 3,000 people we wanted to leave before things got too rowdy. Phillip was fed up long before I was so we stood outside and talked to a retired navy officer about the history of the boat and the role it played in Vietnam and the Gulf War (it was completed a few weeks too late for WWII).

Since Phillip and I had driven down on Monday and the party was the same night we were pretty tired and called it a day after wandering around midway park for awhile. It was surreal to go from such a boistrous party where food and alcohol was plentiful (although I couldn't get even a bottle of water anywhere ... weird.) to the park where many homeless had tucked themselves in for the night. I had brought some snacks from the party so I gave them to one of the many guys sleeping there I wish I had brought so much more.